Maple Bacon and Cheesy Hash Brown Fattie

This all came about because Brenda found a box of "Hamburger Helper Cheesy Hashbrowns"  in the back of the pantry that was getting close to its "use-by" date...

Started with a tube of JD Maple sausage, some of my buckboard bacon, real maple syrup, maple bacon and the hashbrowns.

While the hashbrowns were cooking, I flattened the sausage in a 1 gal baggie, then brushed on some maple syrup.

Layered with buckboard bacon, and when the hashbrowns had cooled, layered a big glob of them in the middle.

Rolled up pinwheel style, then covered with the bacon weave.

Here is one hour in...

Finished....

the "Money Shot"

Wrapped and put in the fridge overnight to firm up, then sliced  and browned in a cast-iron skillet to crisp it all up...

Breakfast is Served... with Pancakes and Fried Eggs.

Enjoy!

Everyone has their own favorite meatloaf recipe.

I don't.  

In fact, I've probably never made a meatloaf the same way twice.

For Mothers day, here's what I made LOML.

Started with Fire Roasted Jalapenos, Green Chilis and some chopped onion,

Which I sauteed with 3 strips of Bacon (cut up) until the bacon was crisp and the onions were caramelized

Added this to 2-1/2lbs ground beef (75/25), 2 eggs, breadcrumbs, yellow mustard, and barbecue sauce.

Then formed a loaf and put it on a fine grate.

Added a pan underneath to catch the drippings,  Brushed on more BBQ sauce for the glaze, then on to the smoker for about 4 hours.  

Took it off when IT reached 155°,

and let it rest for about 20 minutes while I made some mashed potatoes and grilled some corn on the cob.

Served with a side of extra BBQ sauce, which was entirely unnecessary as the Meatloaf was moist and very flavorful.

Tennessee Rain Keeps Comin' Down....

Our "Spring Cleaning" trip to the property in Tennessee was good, but we got hit with three days of straight rain, which made it hard to accomplish  some of the things we wanted to get done.

We left early - 4:00AM early - on Thursday for the drive up.  I wanted to get there at a reasonable time since I was expecting to meet Kevin Snyder on the property. Kevin has a John Deer tractor with a Bush Hog and Loader, and was going to do some work for us.

We made a short stop in Macon on the way up to walk around the BassPro/Outdoor World store, and by the time we got to Dunlap Kevin had already bush-hogged the entire driveway!

Next, we wanted to put in some drain pipe (culverts) at the front of the drive, and about 200 ft in, where we were running into some erosion issues.  Kevin started digging the trenches for the culvert while I started working on the big Red Oak tree that was uprooted.

On Friday Morning we ran over to Daub's plumbing supply and picked up two 18" diam, 20' pipes and strapped them on to Kevin's trailer.  Wasn't long before he got them in place, and spent the rest of the day filling in the trenches and packing in the dirt.

We ran over to the quarry - which happens to be less than 2 miles from the property - and inquired about getting some 6"-8" Surge Rock for the culverts.  They calculated that we needed about 7 Tons of rock, and gave me the name of a local hauler who would pick up the rock and bring it to the property.

Unfortunately, It started raining late Friday night and didn't let up until Monday.  The ground was too soft for the rock truck to come on the drive, so nothing got done.

Monday, same thing, so we walked around and picked up a bunch more trash.  Some time during that process we ran into a little friend.

He was as cute as could be.  Looked like a cross between a labrador retriever and a Dachshund.  he had great big paws and tiny little legs.  He followed us around for several hours while we worked picking up trash in the woods.

Brenda managed to pick up about 20 huge trash bags worth of rubbish off the land, and we took a full truck-bed to the recycling center on Monday.

We decided that it would be nearly impossible to keep the place picked up, and to schlep trash, logs, or anything else up and down the slopes, so we took a ride on Friday night to Tractor Supply to look at a UTV. We found one that we liked - and was withing our budget, but they don't deliver, so we'll have to arrange to pick it up.  Probably have to borrow Kevin Wohl's trailer.
But first a place to keep it:
We bantered back and forth between renting a nearby storage unit and putting in a small shed.  Storage unit made sense from some standpoints, but it felt like we were just spending money that we would have nothing to show for when all was said and done.
There was a local store that had sheds - delivered for free - but we needed level ground.  That meant equipment that we could not get on the drive because of the rain.

So, no UTV, No Shed, and No rock in the culverts.

But. I did manage to get the red oak all cut up - went through two chainsaw chains in the process - and we did get a lot of trash off the property.
We also go the drain lines in, which is a big plus.

So, overall, we got some stuff accomplished.  But we could have done more.

I have to learn to take the "farmer's and rancher's" approach to this stuff:  I can't expect to get everything done at once.  I have to do and accept a little at a time, and work on more the next time.

It's a good life-lesson, just hard for me to accept.

REDNECK SUSHI !

OK... I thought this was a great idea... this is NOT my cooking, but I will probably do it some day soon.

It's form Mark Balli, over at the Smoking Meats community Forum. Here's the link:

Bacon....Sushi with Q - SmokingMeatForums.com Community

".....

Then I was asked if I wanted to supply some finger food for the wife's church dinner for something. So I was thinking what can I do and they have all heard of the Redneck Sushi but I haven't made it for them. So into the freezer I go and I saw some Italian (homemade) sausage. I always have celery, green onions,and some sort of peppers and then some chunk cheese and then topped with some of my homemade BBQ sauces.

So it's easy to make. All you need is some Nori paper (seaweed) and then slice your veg into long strips and then layout your nori and cover with a thin layer of sticky (jasmine) rice. Then just lay your veg and COOKED meat and roll it all up. Then slice into pieces that are all the same thickness and there you go SUSHI with a different twist. Now the biggest problem I have with this dish is it looks so much like real (raw fish) sushi that most folks run from it. So I'm constantly telling the people that it's not fish it's all cooked and it in this case sausage and other COOKED stuff.

......

Looks like a fun way to make some party food... I gotta remember this!

Bon Appetit. And Have Fun Storming the Castle!

Makin' Bacon

You know you're a foodie when....  you make your own bacon!


OK, technically, its not "belly" bacon - the kind we're all used to buying at the grocery store, but I'll put this up for flavor, texture, and quality over anything you can buy, anywhere! 


This is called "buckboard bacon" and it's made from pork shoulder (Boston butt) as opposed to belly.  It's a little leaner and cooks (renders, actually) in about half the time.  


It's still cured and smoked, just like regular belly bacon, only Buckboard is "warm" smoked and belly bacon is usually cold smoked.


I also made about 3 pounds of Canadian Bacon (also called back bacon) which is made from the loin.  It's very lean and fully cooked.

Started with half a loin - trimmed - for the Canadian Bacon (about 4lbs), and a half a boneless Butt for the buckboard (7lbs).

 Used Hi-Mountain cure and let them sit in the fridge for 2 weeks in vacuum bags, turning the bags over every few days.

After two weeks, I took them out of their brine, soaked them in cold water for a few hours to remove the salt layer from the surface, and rinsed completely.  Then patted dry and git them ready to put on the smoker.

Ran the smoker for 30 minutes with no smoke to make sure the surface of the meat was dry at 150º,  then bumped to 175º and added oak and apple wood to begin the smoking process.

When the Internal temp of the meat was at 155º for the Canadian and 140º for the Buckboard (about 6 hours), I took them off the  smoker, wrapped, and rested.

First slice of the Buckboard.  Perfectly cured and smoked.  

Used the electric deli-style slicer to get nice, even pieces.  Ended up with 60 slices of Canadian, and enough buckboard to separate into eight 1/2lb bags.

I put six 10-count packs of Canadian:  Bagged, marked, and ready for the freezer.

This is my second time making both of these.  I had made buckboard once before and smoked it at too high a temperature.  They ended up being a little chewy...  This time I kept a very low temp in the smoker and when these were rendered - I HAD to test them! - they were perfect.  Smokey and tender!

The Canadian was perfect.  And now I have plenty to last me for a while.

Bon Apetit.  And Have Fun Storming the Castle!

Spicy Honey Glazed Tilapia

This was simple and quick enough to make as a weekday meal.  

First, I brined the fish for a little over an hour in a solution of 2qt water, 1/4 cup kosher salt, 1/2 cup white sugar

\

Rinsed and patted dry, rubbed some olive oil on the bottoms and then spread the tops only with honey, black pepper, cayenne pepper, and a little sea salt

On to a little tray and into the smoker for 1 hour @ 225º

One hour later, the fish flakes with a fork, so it's done.

Made a little spicy honey (2 Tbs honey, 1/8 tsp cayenne) and drizzled it over the top as soon as they came off the smoker.

Served with a creamy parmesean risotto (box mix - not home made), and buttered peas.

Dinner is served!

Just some quick notes:  

I made four pieces, the other two went into a smoked fish spread (cream cheese (garden vegetable, plus some roasted garlic cream cheese), mayo, celery, onion powder, old bay, red pepper flakes, and  lemon juice).  The spread was OUTSTANDING!  I would make this again just to make some more spread.  This was as good as any smoked fish spread that I have ever tried!!!

Tilapia absorbs a lot of smoke quickly.  I used one small chunk each of hickory and mesquite.  To me, it was almost too smoky.  Next time, I will use apple and/or cherry and reduce the amount of wood.  

Bon Appetit, and Have Fun Storming the Castle!

Catapults, Part I

When Rachel first asked me to help her build a catapult for her History Fair , I could feel the two sides of my brain lining up to start battle with one another, swords raised, and in full attack mode.

The left part of my brain was saying, "Hmmm, a catapult...  Can we even do that?  The school has a zero-tolerance weapons policy.  But as long as she has the OK from her teacher, then that could pose some very interesting math and physics problems for her to overcome, and would require quite a sturdy structure. 


 What should we use for materials, and just as importantly, what types of joinery should be utilized to reduce the risks of failure from high impact lateral forces?"

The right part of my brain said "A catapult!  Hell yeah!"

So here's the deal I made with her.


1) She does all design work, calculations, and as much of the actual building and construction as I deem safe for her to handle.


2) We do not use real rocks or boulders as projectiles.  We will carve and paint styrofoam blocks to LOOK like boulders, but anything that can cause harm to people or property may NEVER be launched.


3) We will design a series of fail-safes and locking mechanisms that will prevent anyone from using the catapult when it is not under the watchful eye of her or one of her teachers.


4) I get to put goofy bumper stickers and slogans on the back of the thing when it's done (more on this later)


She accepted my deal, and immediately went on the internet to research designs and the physics of the catapult.


The style that she chose is known as the Mangonel


Mangonels fired heavy projectiles from a bowl-shaped bucket at the end of its arm. The Mangonel was used for aiming various missiles at castles, fortresses and cities. This type of catapult was easy to construct and wheels were added to the design to ensure manoeuvrability. The Mangonels were capable of firing projectiles up to 1,300 feet.

One of the interesting things about Mangonels is that they didn't just launch rocks.  According to several of the websites Rachel researched, The Mangonel could launch missiles across long distances. Attackers were ingenious in their ideas for launching projectiles which would cause distress and discomfort inside the castle walls. Mangonel missiles included the following:

• Stones
• Sharp wooden poles and darts
• Fire
• Casks of Burning Tar
• Burning Sand ( this became trapped inside armor )
• Pots of Greek Fire
• Dung
• Disease ridden bodies
• Body parts
• Dead animals
• Any rotting matter
• Quicklime
• Dead, sometime mutilated, bodies (often peasants from outside the castle perimeter) 

That last one kind of gives new meaning to the phrase "Serf's Up!"

--------


Anyway, back to the construct:


Once she picked a plan and drew it to scale, we had to figure out a launching mechanism.  Since the catapults of that time used sinew to create the torsion needed to spring the arm forward, and a few thousand feet of the stuff was hard to find (and out of our budget), we opted for rubber surgical tubing.  Highly stretchable, cheap, and easily obtainable through Amazon.com


The rest of the supplies - mostly wood - was either already in the garage, or was picked up for just a few dollars at the local home improvement store.
(as a side note, it seems kind of ironic that one would go to the "home improvement" store for the materials to build a weapon designed to destroy a home).


With plans in place, we set out to build.  Started by measuring and cutting the 2*6 lumber we were using for the chassis, followed by the wheels and winding guides.





We decided to use pocket-hole joinery for the chassis.  Yeah, I know that's not very historically accurate, but we needed something that 
1) she could do easily and accurately
2) provided a strong joint
3) we could easily disassemble/reassemble as needed until the unit was done, and then add glue for the final build. 


Using the KREG pocket hole system, Rachel assembled the entire chassis (and learned a new skill!)


The wheels and guides were made from a sheet of 5/8" OSB, that was cut into six 16" x 48" strips.  Those strips were stacked 3 high and glued together into 2 pieces, which were then cut into six 16" x 16" x 1.875" squares.
The squares were then cut using a circle-cutting jig on the bandsaw into four 15" diameter wheels, and two 10" diameter winding guides.


Here's Rachel at the band saw cutting the wheels with the circle-cutting jig.

Finished wheels, stacked and ready for drilling the holes for the axles.

Rachel used a 1" spade bit to cut the axle holes in each of the wheels.  We used the dimple left by the circle-cutting jig to ensure that each of our holes were dead-center.

That's all we were able to accomplish on day one and two.  We moved the parts into the shed for now, and will get back to it next weekend.

Bon Appetit, and Have Fun Storming the Castle!

-Steven

For my wife on Valentines Day

For my wife, who prefers chocolate-covered bacon to chocolate-covered strawberries, thank you for spending the time with me so that we could make both, together. You feed my soul.

For my wife, who knows the starting lineup for both the Bucs *AND* the Rays, and who watches SportsCenter even when I am not home, thank you for justifying our tailgating equipment by calling them "hurricane supplies." I am your biggest fan.

For my wife, who used her work merit rewards to buy a charcoal smoker instead of a gold necklace, thank you for the sharing my passions. You keep the embers inside me burning.

For my wife, who shares my dreams for the future, thank you for being a part of it.

I love you as much today as the day I married you.

-Steven